VTMAS No.26: I Broke My New Underwear

Having kids is both a blessing and a curse. I love my kids, but I have to admit, until they came along, I remember having far more patience and way fewer blow up sessions. Regardless, they give us some of the most awesome and mind-blowing moments of comedy that I can’t even fathom or create on my own.

This particular memory was while I was pregnant with “baby brodder” and amazingly my toddler had mastered potty training. He was so proud of his new underwear. I had bought him some Disney character themed ones and the boy was doing amazing. Not even peeing the bed, and I like to believe it was because I made it very clear that it was ok to get up, leave your room, and pee-pee at night or come get mommy.

My husband and I were snuggled on the couch watching a late late night movie. Our toddler had been asleep a good 2 hours by this point, so when he came sobbing out of the hallway we had thought he peed the bed finally.

“Mommy~ Daddy~ Ijajwhfakfhwhwhwahsdhaawaaa!” We were having a hard time understanding him through his choking sobs.

“Bubba, did you peepee the bed?” My husband questioned. “It’s ok if you did, you’re not in trouble-”

“NOOOoo~!” He wailed, doing the infamous tantrum foot stomp dance. “I brwawalksjdlakfdhfkwaaaawaaa!”

Once more the crying interfered with the message, but I had understood it. Bursting into laughter, my husband looked at me bewildered, “What did he say?”

I had tears in my eyes, “You’re going to have to take this one, Daddy! Bahahahahahaa!”

At this point, the toddler had caught his breath as he exclaimed, “Daddy! I broke my new underwear!”

My husband smirked as he turned his attention back to the distraught child as it hit us that we failed to explain his underwear had a flap or opening in the front.

“My weewee broke my underwear!” At this point, my husband could not keep himself from laughing.

“Bubba, you didn’t break your underwear…” And Daddy walked him back to bed and explained that all his new underwear had a “hole” in them.

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